Frame of Reference

I found out today that we are going to open in a little over a week. Double duty work doesn't sound appealing to me at all. I knew it was coming, just ... so soon? I saw a church sign that read: "If you are a friend of the world you are an enemy of God." It doesn't make sense at all to me. Do they not believe that God created the world? I also saw a sign at an automotive repair shop that read: "A good place to take a leak." I laughed. That's great advertising!

I truly feel that the line is blurred. I can't tell when to voice my opinions and feelings with the risk of sounding obnoxious and creating drama, or when to just hold it in and let it slide. What if I know that no matter what I say, it won't change anything? Are my feelings valid enough to make them known? Or, what if by the simple fact of voicing my opinions I come across as selfish? What if there is no audience that is interested in listening. I don't always think that I am right. I am always open to opposing arguments. But, it's the creation of arguments I don't want. Communication is the key to everything, but what if there is a wrong way to communicate. If the words that I say have lost all meaning... how do I express myself validly? Stupid gravity.

Sometimes I get into a creative "phase". I've been braiding necklaces lately. This is one of my all time favorites. The hemp is really really soft and thin too! I love how it flows into different colors. This is going to be the last summer I work at Jake's, (I hope). We can never declare anything with any certainty, but still. I want to move on. I feel like I'm ready to jump to the next lily pad. Speaking of lily pads, I've perused names again: Synshry Nyx Harper Toby Another bit of randomness: I love Pandora. I love that I can go from Tegan and Sara to Celtic Woman to Vivaldi to Silversun Pickups. I also love that I was asked if I'd heard from my father this morning. The answer was no. Literally an hour later I got a text from him. Dad - "Snowin hard here :) Me - "You're up early" Dad - "Had 2 walk the 3 legd cat :)" That was the extent of it. I think we're making progress on this whole conversing thing!!

Got a LOT Accomplished today!

Hope by ~ jericho1405 on deviant ART A picture that stopped me in my tracks. Wow.

My P-Unit (Parental Unit) is sick. It came on so suddenly too. Scarily so. One moment she's telling me her throat is verging on soreness and she'd better take something before it escalated - to not 12 hours later being feverish and lethargic and just sick. I feel so helpless but yet really wanting to feel helpful. I think I end up just making tons of noise "trying" to be quiet. Now I hear coughing and I can't help but wince with sympathy. Today really felt like the first day of spring. In February even. I had to be outside as much as I could. Cleaned out the cars, went for a walk (albeit a slow one). Open windows are the gateway to happiness. I need gateways to understanding and emotions. I feel it's ironic that I shrug away plans and schedules when at the core of it...I need a direction. It sucks when you are going in one direction only to change trails. It's a good thing I have such an amazing knack for finding my way.

I had my taxes done yesterday. All I can say is YIKES. I was expecting it, but still, I have to admit I was hoping to be pleasantly surprised. I wasn't. Things could be worse though. I'm so very grateful I set aside enough for this specific situation. Afterwards I was feeling rebellious. I drove straight to the tattoo shop and got a piercing. I wanted to try the industrial again. Didn't hurt half as much as the first time and we (the piercer and I) agreed that it would be very beneficial to get an extra long bar since I have such sensitive skin and tend to swell. What can I say? Fragility be thy name. Had a great Valentine's Day dinner with the P-unit and a great group of people. I was, for a moment, getting the feeling that I was in a "Friends" episode. Good times. Irish wake is tasty but not very strong, just sayin'.

It's day twelve. I think I've internalized a lot. I think that just because we (as humans) express things differently, doesn't mean that the feelings are different. I broke a bone on the side of my foot. It's barely seen but hugely felt. Funny thing is...it has been a gradual build up of pain. Not really sudden. No bruising or swelling either. New shoes and taxes.