Frame of Reference

Had one of my nose bleeds last night. Lasted a lot longer than usual, was getting kind of lightheaded. Large clot at the end, came down my throat. That was lovely. I think I managed to gross my loved ones out, always a plus! House is snagged at the moment. I want to walk away from it actually, but a part of me needs to see it through to the end, whatever that might be. Terror, terror, shooting on the news. The world is going crazy. I try not to watch all of the bad stuff and only get the headlines or necessary info from and for work purposes. Watched Band of Brothers. Cried like a baby. Asked my dad if he liked war movies. He doesn't. I kind of wish I could talk to him about his life... but alas. Baby steps. My main men ->

There is a lot of fear and a lot of doubts. It's as if there is a grey mist surrounding us. The world. People. Me. My family. It's possible that it's always there and we just happily ignore it. Not much we can do about it anyway, right? But sometimes it's hard not to get lost in the staring. I find myself staring and my mind plays tricks. Making shapes out of inanimate objects and my imagination goes wild. You think you see something only to have it disappear in a thicker fog. I'm not sure we are going to come out of this patch the same. I'm almost certain that we aren't. The whole thing makes me want to grab hands and hold on that much tighter. To scream at those around me that we should treasure right now. To look around. Look at each other. Admittedly I feel alone in this. I think it's my M.O. Pretty selfish of me to think that I am the only self aware one of the group. Yet it is only me staring into the tendrils of fog most times. Hands wil...

I think sometimes that more than luck is at play. The odds are in - For you or against you. I like lists and I like randomness My foot hurts and has been. Shoes or screws. I had a dream about Julia Roberts, but she looked like she did in Pretty Woman.