Almost Tomorrow



If I don't get a grip... Sometimes things can seem very overwhelming and I have a very strong tendency to think the worst or let myself spiral. It's so odd because I am a very smart person. I'm just not a rational person a lot of the time.
Sometimes I laugh at the absurdity of luck or direction or paths. If I chose this, which I believe I did before I was born, to learn things... I had higher expectations then, then I do now. If that makes any sense whatsoever.
And then sometimes I think... what if EVERYONE in my life were happy. Were secure and stable enough to deal with the problems without any input from me. Where would I be? Is that something that I depend on? Being able to help? What would I do if I didn't do that? Then I stop thinking because the answer terrifies me.
I watched J.J. Abrams Super 8 today. It wasn't a great movie. Great for young adults, for sure, but my favorite part was the line the main character said when he's rescuing the girl and being confronted by the monster, he says, "I'm just trying my best to save you." It was so "non-heroic" it was pretty great. It made me smile and remember it.
I dread tomorrow. Tomorrow I lay all the cards on the table. At least its only going to last three days.

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