Tranquil Twenty-seven

Jitters over tomorrow. 8 am until 9 pm theoretically. A long day. And so it starts. I'm excited. First day of school butterflies. Swing set was procured. Now it's just a matter of putting it together. A little bundle of firewood, maybe some s'mores in the future? If wishes were fishes. An alarm system set for install, list two emergency contacts that you can count on to come to your house in case of an emergency.....   I had absolutely no one to write down. Not one person in my life that I could count on to be there for me in an emergency, in case my house was burning down or I was being held at gunpoint. I embarrassingly just handed the clip board to my mother. At least she has friends here. I'm not saying that to garner pity.. it's just a fact. A sad fact and a testament to my personality, but all the same.
I'm proud of my family tonight. Despite illness and tempers and 2 year old woes, my sister and her family are amazing. I love them and wouldn't trade them for anyone else.
I think that's my challenge in this life cycle... if reincarnation is real, which I think it is. I think we keep coming back to learn lessons, because that's the meaning of life. To learn. And I think that this rotation on earth, I'm meant to experience love. Family love, heartache, lost love, new love, baby love, sibling love, parental love, parental loss. That's my whole reason for being here. I am so lucky in every other aspect. Money? Even if I can't pay a bill, I will get an extension out of nowhere or a check in the mail from a family member? A house? Sold. Car? Too easy. A job? I can have my pick. Intelligence? I'd say above average and naturally. But heart matters? That's where I'm learning, that's my niche. That's my soft spot and sore spot and overall just.... That's what I'm doing this life.

Sunrises at work. When the color grows into a pastel paradise of soothing colors and frigid temperatures. It's a bit breathtaking.