Wednesday 00

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Rough Day.
Every day is a good day. I am physically doing awesome. I have a roof and food and a loving family. There are so many people out there who have it so bad. I have no room to complain, and yet...
I hate seeing those that I love in turmoil. I hate fighting and stress and tension.
I love my little man and I love sleeping with him at night and taking naps and I love being the only person in his world if only for a few hours. Just him and me.
I got my wrappings wet.

Therapy 107

I had a couple of hours before "my ass" had to report for work. Enough time to make my appointment with the therapist.

Me:  Polite
Th:  Polite?
Me:  Yes. That's all we have. 
Th:  Were you not polite before?
Me:  Of course we were! That's not what I mean! It's just, that's IT! Do you know what I mean?
Th:  Obviously I don't. Help me to understand.
Me:  ... I don't understand either. I don't understand what it is going on.
Th:  Do you think it would be more beneficial to end all communication?
Me:  Sometimes. It just hurts and I don't understand how it can't hurt for the other person?
Th:  How do you know that it doesn't?
Me:  How could it if she continues to proceed as if nothing has happened?
Th:  A coping skill perhaps? Do you think the world stops spinning without you in it? Is she supposed to collapse in an inconsolable heap?
Me:  Who am I to say? My world would. ( a smirk. It's not returned. )

Two men dressed in black business suits observe Evan lying on an examination table under bright lights. The machines beep soundlessly and the wires connected to her head are moved occasionally by her eyes darting back and forth under closed lids.
"This is taking too long." One of the men says.
"We can try to be more aggressive with our approach." The man standing next to him replies.
"Do It. We need the information and she has it."

The man steps around the corner of the room and comes face to face with the doctor. Her name badge reads, Dr. Judy Ryelle.
"We need to increase the simulation. We are running out of time. Do whatever you have to do to extract the information that we need. I don't need to remind you what's at stake."


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