The poison
I have sun poisoning, and probably lupus. (Just kidding, kind of) my joints (elbows, knees and jaw) are killing me. They are swollen and ache and if you google sunburn and joint pain... lupus. (Still jesting)
First soccer practice. So much fun! It's hard not try to talk to him. I tried my hardest to let the coach actually coach. I also have to keep in mind he's 2. Learning skills and such, so cute. They are growing so fast.
Had a lot on my mind today. Things should have stopped when I said I was done. I should have stopped, but I have some insane guilt that I'm carrying around with me and I want nothing more than for understanding to be had. It's just a little unfair that conversations and questions go unanswered when I cross a line (and rightfully so) but I don't get that same respect given to me. I don't give it to myself and I should. Boundaries, another lesson I'm learning.
But I need to let that go. I made bad decisions and did things I regret, but I can't undo them. I've apologized and did what I thought was right. We can learn from our past and move on, become better people and change.
I'm doing what I believe is right, right now. I'm fighting for friendships that the world says is impossible. I'm not running from my problems. I'm changing my entire life.. and well, no one says that is easy.
First soccer practice. So much fun! It's hard not try to talk to him. I tried my hardest to let the coach actually coach. I also have to keep in mind he's 2. Learning skills and such, so cute. They are growing so fast.
Had a lot on my mind today. Things should have stopped when I said I was done. I should have stopped, but I have some insane guilt that I'm carrying around with me and I want nothing more than for understanding to be had. It's just a little unfair that conversations and questions go unanswered when I cross a line (and rightfully so) but I don't get that same respect given to me. I don't give it to myself and I should. Boundaries, another lesson I'm learning.
But I need to let that go. I made bad decisions and did things I regret, but I can't undo them. I've apologized and did what I thought was right. We can learn from our past and move on, become better people and change.
I'm doing what I believe is right, right now. I'm fighting for friendships that the world says is impossible. I'm not running from my problems. I'm changing my entire life.. and well, no one says that is easy.
